A few Sundays ago, I got a call from a family member that they needed me to run an errand. I was frustrated and didn't want to answer the phone, but I did and to my not so surprise, it was a call for help. They had left their phone while at a work site and wanted me to pick it up from the person who had it. I told them I was busy doing something and did not want to leave the house. They added pressure, and I succumbed to it. I decided to quickly run the errand. The only issue was, when I drove the 15 minutes to the location and knocked on the door, the person living there had no clue what I was talking about. To make a long story short, there was a bit of confusion and miscommunication. Safe to say, I was frustrated and irritated that I left the comfort of my own home to be caught up in some bull corn when this family member could have called someone close to us who lived only 2 minutes around the corner to do it instead.
Let's fast forward to a couple of Saturdays ago. I had been waiting for the weekend all week and had a full day of events. I had talked to this same family member a few days earlier and pressed upon them how they needed to get to the doctor and get themselves checked out to which they responded that they didn’t have time for that, they had to work and make money. On this particular Saturday they called, and I rejected the call. It was 11:15 am, and I was enroute to the first of four commitments that I had. I decided to call my sibling and have them check on our family member to see what was up and if it was an emergency to call me back.
They called to check on them and that family member wanted me to stop what I was doing so I could run to the store and get them some ibuprofen or pain meds because they had another gout flare up. I said to my sibling, they got me messed up. If they aren't going to take their health seriously, then why should I. I am busy and on the route to my appointment. I then put my phone on DND because I was not about to be bothered by this situation for the rest of the day.
Fast forward to the end of the day. It was 11:30pm and I was just getting home. Hopped into the shower, brushed my teeth and face, and put on my pajamas. I got into my bed and decided to check my text messages, and this is what was waiting for me:
"I can't believe that you would let me be in pain the whole day and night. At the end of your day, you didn't have time to drop the medication off. There's no justification for that, thank God my sister-in-law had the same meds and although she had a lot of things to do, she made sure at the end of her day, she got to me last and went home for the night. If it had been you, I would have done the same, especially knowing you were home in pain. What you did was wicked. Think about it"
It's safe to say this text message rubbed me the wrong way. I went downstairs to vent to my son about it and his immediate response was to tell our family member to get out of their feelings. First of all, I am a grown adult, and we are not in the days when I am a child forced to do anything. I have lived a whole life and have raised my kids to adults. If your health is not important to you, then it's not important to me.
In this season of my life, it's called protecting my peace. It is not my fault that some people have selective memories when it comes to all the things, we have done for them. When I feel underappreciated, I will take a step back and focus on myself, because I am my first priority. Healthy relationships are balanced ones, and balance includes giving and receiving. What I must always remember is that my kindness is freely given and never wasted, even if it isn't always remembered.
Sending you love, light and positive vibes,
Cassie K.
"Always remember to LIVE life to the fullest, to LAUGH at everything and to LOVE unconditionally!"
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